Right around this time on October 14, 2014, when Chad had less than eight hours to live, I put a cd of his in the player. I pulled out my cell phone to call and tell him I was listening to his cd on my new ceiling speakers. The cd didn’t play so I tucked the phone back into my pocket to try and fix the cd…I got sidetracked and never called him.
How simple it would have been for God to allow that cd to work just that one time. Why? Why? Just 30 seconds for me to dial his number and for him to answer. After all, the love and caring Chad gave in his life, WHY? I prayed my way through making this video. And even before I finished I knew. I just knew… And those who watch the video will understand during the last 18 minutes.
When I started making the video (without realizing it, 3 days after he died) I was concerned I didn’t have enough material because most of our photos from when my children were younger, were lost in a flood. Well, what I forgot about were the videos from graduation, Disneyworld, etc. And I’m so very grateful for the photos I do have, and for those who sent material to use.
PLEASE … like on Youtube and follow
THANK YOU!
Or search on Youtube. Chad Ryan Engstrom Memorial Documentary
6 replies on “Memorial Documentary ~ Chad Ryan Engstrom #childloss #grief #memorial”
Oh my precious sister,
I just finished watching your incredible, beautiful, heart wrenching video. Your son was a handsome, funny, kind hearted man and my heart ached just watching it. I can’t say how very sorry I am. Depression is such a horrible thing. Both of my boys were considered bipolar and were suicidal in their teen years. I lived with that fear. And yet, even from his own video recording, who could have guessed about your Chad. You did an amazing job and as moving as it is, you also help educate people about suicide and bereavement. Thank you for sharing your son and your heart. ❤❤❤
Sadly, there are so many suicides happening. I just heard that a young minister with two small children took his life a couple weeks ago. Just heartbreaking. There is so much to Chad’s story there is no way to tell it all. If I mention one thing there’s a dozen things to add to that one event and so I just did my best to show why I believe God allowed him to die.
You mentioned your sons. It sounds as if they took their lives. I’m so very sorry and of course I understand what you’re going through, although losing two would have to be even harder. So many suicides. My email is katjanzanderson@aol.com if you ever want to talk. Thank you for your comments. Hugs <3
I’m sure it will be a beautiful tribute and I can’t wait to see it!
I’ve been a little nervous about it and wondered why I made it, but I reminded myself it’s for Chad. He will live on even when I’m gone.
I am sure it’s beautiful. Love you sister
Thank you. Love you.